Live

if you knew that today was that day that your life were to change for the worst, what would you do? If you knew that your end was closer than you expected, what would travel through your mind? If that news you recieved  would not only affect you, but that it would affect others around you...what would that change? Would knowing that things were about to change drastically, would that mean you'd look at the people in your circle differently? Would they somehow mean more to you or less? Who would you want to be there in your corner holding your hand and telling you that no matter what, they'd be there with you every step of the way? Would you have regrets? Would you wonder what stones you left untouched? Who would you like to hear from? What places would you like to go? Would that place be your first visit? What would tomorrow mean to you and what Will you do different?

Lets Play Catch

I can recount memories and words that have been thrown that have been either caught or batted back at me. Look, take me as I am but know that I strive to be better and if that is not catching, then let the ball drop. Deliver the world at your doorstep is what I endeavor for, but I ask that you wipe your feet at the threshold. Think on that!

Seeping Deep

I am ready for what tomorrow will bring. I will face its challenges head on and I will trust in knowing the things that have been poured into me. I shall not worry of things I see, but know that truth comes in the form of faith. Oh ye of little faith shall not dwell in my thoughts, for I will walk in the knowledge that all things work together for those who love the lord. Even if adversity knocks, I will calm the seas and step out on faith and conviction on the word that directs my path. I pray that these words be given life through my eyes and whoever else may encounter them. Seep deep….deep

Rest Tonight

I am still amazed at you. So much beauty that exudes from, through and within you that I feel abundantly blessed to have found time spent with you. I find a growing deep appreciation of having your presence spread upon me. Everything from your laughter, playful spirit and vulnerabilities I get to rest in, I find comfort in. Everyone should know this emotion, even if it’s for a brief moment. I don’t express it as often as I want too but know that every, every moment I am under your air, I feel lucky to be there. I don’t take for granted the time spent next to you. For as long as I can, I’ll dance alongside you, forever creating our own unique rhythm. Rest tonight my love. Rest tonight.

My Name is Jade

You know when your somewhere and you hear a song come on and it takes you back? You can’t help but say, “THAT’S MY ISH!” For me it’s several songs but I am also reminded of history when I find myself in places or situations that bring back familiar passions. Here, follow me for a second: I could hear the music playing, and the scene was one that was very familiar to me. The grayed out, smokey atmosphere was one I’d seen many-a-day. The music loud, which drowned out conversations across the room. Yet still people conversed as though they were in a library. I could never wrap my mind around that. So there I was in a space I’d always found a sort of peace. I searched around the room looking for faces I’d grown accustomed to seeing. You know the faces; the girl with the titties out and the too short skirt on. Or the dude that has been drinking and smoking too much, but still thinks that every female in the place wants him. How about the group of females that came together and the one in the middle has dollar bills pinned to her because it’s her birthday. Yeah, I could go on and on, but mainly my eyes always searched the DJ booth, the bouncers, the managers and the doors. You may be wondering why I’d be looking at the DJ booth, but what you may not realize is, ALL the action in most clubs starts in that booth. He/she’s the one that has ties to every person affiliated with that particular spot. They’re the ones that can either open the door, or make sure that mofo stays shut. The bouncers were the ones that got you to the booth, which in turn got you to the DJ, who in turn, turned you on to the managers and after you took care of them, you were introduced to the owners. Rarely would it be just one person that owned the spot and rarely were they not tied to some illegal shit. So in essence, this was my home. I’d already made a name for myself, but I knew that in order for me to get what I truly wanted I’d have to make myself some new powerful friends. I wanted power! I had the dough and the respect of anyone that crossed my path. I never had to say or do much because I’d established myself as someone you simply didn’t want to fuck with. My peers (yeah, that’s what I’ll call them in this chapter) always lined up on my behalf. Look at me wrong and yo ass might have gotten carried out and tossed on your ass….after getting your ass whipped! Don’t get me wrong, I’ve never been the ‘mean’ guy or the stand out guy. I’ve just been given….or better yet, I’ve earned respect so others wouldn’t stand for someone to disrespect me. I never really knew my position until Mr. Grey waved for me to come over. Mr. Grey….ahhh, Mr. Grey. He was the owner of ‘The Grey Spot’. I can remember it like it was yesterday. No one in my camp even saw him do it, but I caught his quick pinky wave over. Man this dude was cool. I mean he was a smooth charismatic dude with unbelievable power around town. Man it was like if this dude thought of hurting you, you was hurt! I am not playing either. OK, OK, I will admit, I was a little nervous going over to him because after all, I was an up and coming player and I didn’t want to step on any toes, but I also knew I had to be respected too. Not that he would outwardly disrespect me, but you get the picture. Man it seemed like something in the movies. Everything went into slow motion and no one in my circle noticed I’d made a move over to Mr. G and funny thing is, his people didn’t seem to notice either. Man, the first words out of his mouth were, “Your father my my nigga!”, and right then I knew I was good and that I was in. He went on talking about how he and my father use take fools paper and dare them to say a word. My father never really talked about people by name, so I would’ve never put Mr. G with my father in a million years. I don’t know why though, because my father was a General in this game too. “Anything you want or need, I got you”. After G spoke those words to me I knew what it meant. Simply put, my business would grow 100 times the size it was, overnight. I have to raise my own eyebrow because even as I write this I’m like, wow! I never really had to raise a hand of my own and yet the level of respect that was offered to me was unheard of. Shoot it still is to this day. Now don’t get me wrong, I’ll beat a nigga’s ass twice if I need too, but sure, why not let someone do it for you? G had a impeccable mind. He could remember conversations verbatim from years ago. He was a mathematical genius, which means he was a calculating beast that remembered everything. He was one that didn’t do well with disappointment and his disappointment was not like a you and I disappointment. If you told G that you were going to be somewhere at 7 and you got there at 7:05, this dude would flip and his flip was to the extreme. I remember that exact scenario happening to one of his people and G broke a bottle across his head and told him he would not see 7:06 if that ever happened again. That dude almost lost his life over 5 minutes. G also had homes and apartments everywhere. I remember we were coming back in town from a west coast business trip and as we were landing he leaned over to me asked me to go to the leasing office of one of the apartments he had and let them know that he would not be renewing his lease. He said be there at 9 because according to my lease I have to give them 60 days notice and the lease will expire in 234 hours. I was like what the ?!?!? Why is that even on your mind? Did they call you or were you just looking over the lease???? Nope, that was just G. He’d had a female staying there and was done with her so he cancelled or refused to renew the lease. I’m pretty sure he didn’t let her know that she needed to move either. I did go to that leasing office with the notice and wanted to let the girl know that she needed to move, but that would’ve been disrespectful to G, so I left that in his hands. Shoot for all I know, it could’ve been a test for me. Power is perhaps the most dangerous thing on this planet. It’s addictive. The more you have, the more you want more of it. I was falling victim to it’s power and didn’t realize it. I had what many people wanted. I owned nice homes. I Drove phat cars. I had the pretty woman, with the pretty women on the side. I had both the name and face recognition. I definitely had the money. I had the ‘that nigga is not to be fucked with’ swag. Yet there I was finding myself finding holes in G’s empire. They began to seem larger and larger and soon enough there would either be a split or a hostel take over. This is my story, and my name is Jade

No Title

Is respect earned or given? Call me a fool but respect is given then lost and is capable of being earned back. The moment you find yourself asking for respect is the moment you need to look in the mirror and check the things that may need adjustment. If no adjustment is needed on your end, make the proper change needed to be respected. 

Eyes Closed

Connectivity that becomes complacent within the boundaries of the limitations set before hand are only limited to the availability of ones imagination. Even a circle has an entrance and exit point, so must that which connects me to that that is not suppose to be. Makes sense? Sure it doesn’t! Here let me explain: I sit here and I watch her as she sleeps so peaceful and in perfect harmony with the nights breeze. I can feel her even as I sit across the room from her. I can relax in her rest and find such a rest that I need to express it through writing. Strangely enough I can feel her heart beating to the rhythm of my own. We are years apart and this is not suppose to be possible but I cannot ignore the drum that beats continuously within the realm of my inquiry. Am I crazy? I try my damnest to ignore it but yet its rhythmatic notes are seemingly written just for the beat that is meant to sustain me. Trust me when I say, it makes no sense but I am no fool to silence that which has landed into my lap with a thunderous boom. I want so bad for this puzzle to fit and be finished but it is not my pace to which it is to be finished. The outer layer has been placed and now comes the inner workings that ties all together. It’s sort of a backward way of doing things but oddly enough it’s working. Still she sleeps nearby and passion beats out of me like a waterfalls end. Yeah yeah, when a man loves a woman……. When I love a woman, I love her and desire only her. I search for perfections within her sight and seek nothing but acceptance of her. I find every comfort in her. As she rest I wish she could see my light for her and some how be raptured up in it to the point that nothing escapes her, and all that which is left is beauty. This may make no sense but only to the one that it is meant to make sense too, but to you whose eyes read this and comprehends its measure, I say to you, I love you. Words cannot explain the fortitude to which I have found myself in resolve of pleasing you, but trust me when I say that I am better with you. It is not meant that man be alone and he that finds a wife findeth a good thing. While You are not mine just yet I continue to pray and believe in something that much greater than you or I could ever imagine fully. I write this while you rest without looking at the words to which this contains, and yet somehow I feel as though you’ll get it. WTF is that> literally my eyes are closed and my fingers are painting a picture just as the artistry that your hand creates. Daily I question why me, and I try to make sense of this, but I cannot and I’ve began to accept the fact that this is not for me to figure out, but rather it is for me to measure upp to and simply exist in it. That is soooooo not me lol. OK, so that said, I’ll end with this: Dear words, please do not escape me as I I seek after this which has been brought together. No matter what others may say, if she allows, I know she’ll find delightment in all that which is to be. Gosh I know this one makes NO sense to some readers, but I do wonder if it makes sense to the one I think it’s meant too. I’ll most certainly have to reread this one, one day….it was written with my eyes closed!

Moving

I've never really worried about what people thought me. I considered myself to be good and willing to do for others as needed. If you passed judgement on me, I simply brushed it and you off and kept it moving. I was recently in a situation where just the thought of outside influence prevented true positivity from happening and it caused me to reflect. I wondered much and thought more, then I remembered the good that'd been lost and I paused. While it shouldn't matter what others "think", because they're not the be-all-that-ends-all, I understand that truly it is not as easy for others as it is for me. We are spirits having a worldly experience, so I believe that because of this I am able to look differently upon a situation and move differently through it. My flesh is tempteral and the who of who I am is everlasting. Look across and see that and all the rest shall fade.

So What

So GD what! Who cares that you are like a rare diamond, so beautiful and unique! So GD what! Who cares that your kiss is as soft as angelic clouds! So GD what! That your skin calls to me in a language curtailed for my ears only! So GD what! Who cares that your voice makes my day! So GD what!

Follow Me

Follow me,  following you!
Watch me, watching you!
Pull me, as I pull you! Speak to me, as I speak into you!
See me, as I see all in you!
Listen to me, as im changed by your words!
Be flesh of my flesh. Bone of my bone. Be mine, as I'm yours for a lifetime.

Was that clear or shall I repeat myself?

Follow me, following you!
Watch me, watching you!

Oh my bad, I just wanted to be clear!

Sun Ray

She is like sun rays sneaking through the blinds. I'd describe her as pure desire. Careful you must be to treasure the uniqueness she brings with her light. Entangle yourself in the sculptured beauty before you while in her presence. Taste the soft pleasures of delicacies amongst her curves. Ponder in what knowledge she's yet to bring forth. She delights my minds most deepest passions and I find it a must to express even those things I try to contain. Blindly I'm caught up in the rapture of her, for the light she brings seeps in through my blinds.


Good morning

Oh well. New days ahead..... Again

A Lil Time

Spend a little time with me and discover the things of which I’ve yet to encounter of myself. Lets spend some time devouring our space and time and smile in the realization that we’ve passed days under one anothers comfort. Stretch my mind that it wraps around your every word. Open up my darkest secrets and whisper ‘it’s ok’ into the lobs of my ears. Allow me to take risk in places and things that I never imagined I would; all the while carefully holding my hand. Give me passion that feeds my soul that pushes out moments that last a while. A little time can go a long way so don’t be afraid of this journey. The path that has been laid before us was created long before we stepped foot to it. Grab my hand and lets see what joys we may encounter…..

I know that I won't get that chance but I'll enjoy the today before tomorrow ends.

I Listened to the Issues

I listened to the issues that faced many and knew I’d love you through all of them.
I watched them dance closely with others and knew these arms only open for you.
I saw them eat separately and knew it was there that I prayed of us.
I saw the change in their eyes and knew you’d always be the same beauty before me now.
I heard the distance and instantly and urge to pull you close fell upon me.
I listened to the complaints and knew I’d always communicate in a way that effects change positively.
I watched as they couldn’t stand the sight of one another and knew you’d always have my eye.
I saw how they could no longer see love and smiled a lil, feeling how much I loved you.
I knew they no longer celebrated each other and felt like celebrating my gifts found in you.
I listened to the lost in their voices and knew that even now I could hear you from a distance.
I heard the bickering in expectations and rested in the comfort of our daily enjoyments without them.

I heard the issues and couldn’t wait to see you and tell you that you are more than I could have imagined for myself and that as long as there is breath in my body I will forever show and tell you just how much you mean to me .

Experience the Experience

One seldom gets to experience true experience of introspective thinking. I mean to really sit and explore the depths of the mind that opens up perception in a way that cannot be contracted. I’m talking about the kind of thinking that takes time but much is revealed in an instant. Imagine being able to flip through the pages of your mind and locate the very essence of what defines you. This experience has no words to explain the complexity of these measures, yet when they are found you know exactly what is to be made of these cups of knowledge. How wonderful it is to seek out yourself and learn from…you! Never be afraid to explore experience.

Dear

Dear Tiffany,

I still like you!

Let Me Talk

Hey Earl, let me talk to you for a second…

I get to see and witness the many marvels that God has made from nothing but dust and I find pleasure in it all. It would not be enough for me to simply say that beauty, as astoundingly as it may be, can be found in most things, but rather I’ll take the complex road and seek the detail in these things. Pause for a moment and take in the brilliance that lives around our individual worlds and notice that the rather smaller things are the ones that make the most difference. It is not that a kiss was placed upon my lips but rather it was the fact that she turned around to come back to leave it. It was not that he waved as he accepted his diploma, but rather it was that he searched the many faces to find the ones that meant the most. It was not that she tutored him, but rather that she knew that he required additional help. There…right there inside the ‘rathers’ is where you’ll find exception to the monotony and no longer rest in the complacency that this world would have you become redundant too. It is said that it is the little things that make the biggest difference, so I’ll seek to find the rather in things that surround me. I could challenge the time allotted to be with her, but rather I’ll find comfort in the minutes we share together. I think today instead of worrying about the things that I don’t have, I’ll enjoy the many things in which I do. It is not what I try to offer up to her, but rather it is becoming what she adds to me. She slows me down unlike anyone before and the detail to which she adds unto me I pray last throughout the breaths that sustain me. From out of nothing I was formed, and when I am done I shall be returned to my original state, so why not find comfort, peace, joy, happiness, hope, beauty and life in the things that surround us? Seek the good first and the rest will follow suit!

You alright with me Tiffany.....yea you def are, with yo lil nice looking butt

Readers

Wow! I didn't know that so many readers follow this blog. By far I see that the top 2 post I have are "Write It" and "Brother King". I usually don't read what I write but I was compelled to read those after seeing the number of views they get. Funny that both of those were inspired by the voice of my Father.
I'll try to write more often. After all I really enjoy it. Thanks all!!!!